How Many Children is Just Right
A short time ago somebody sent me a news article about a discussion in the mommy blog world about when or if someone should add a third child to the mix. I guess more couples are opting to have three children nowadays. My friend wondered what I thought given that I have six children. Today for Carrie’s Foto Fiesta I want to share my wisdom gained through hard earned experience along with a favorite pic of my children.
This is my fav because it accurately depicts my children. When they are together they often look like a basket of puppies sitting and lying all over each other. I think this pic was taken in 2004 or 2005. I have trouble with dates including birthdates of my children. I am certain that each of them has a birthday and it comes around once a year.
Back to the original theme. Here is what I tell people about adding children.
Number 1-This is an exciting and life changing experience. One day there is just the two of you and the next you are three and your life will never be the same again. There is a lot of learning and anxiety in taking care of this first baby.
You faithfully complete the baby book with lots of pictures and each new milestone.
Number 2-This is exciting but you have one under your belt so you can be more relaxed and enjoy it more. The baby book gets most of the blanks filled in.
Number 3- This is a major leap. You know why? Because now the parents are outnumbered by children! Any time you go anywhere it becomes problematic about who is taking care of which child. In our case number 3 was born at home in a freak May snowstorm. The midwife didn’t make it and Nancy delivered on her own with me frantically telling her to relax and her telling me that she was relaxed and would I please take a chill pill for hell sakes.
The baby book has the child’s birth date and a few comments about the birth recorded.
Number 4- You have now reached the point where things are again difficult. All the hand me down baby clothing is competely worn out. You have out grown most normal cars. You figured out a long time ago that a daily bath for a baby and each child isn’t necessary. They get one once a week whether they need it or not.
You bought a baby book but damned if you can find it.
Number 5-Who is counting at this point? The oldest children now have friends coming and going. You are not even sure if all the children in the house belong to you. You just discipline who ever needs it and feed who ever shows up.
You keep telling yourself you should go pick up a baby book.
Number 6-Four of our six children were born at home including number six. It was a crazy night. When Andrew arrived and everything was cleaned up and he was wrapped and in my wife’s arm I looked at her and said, “I don’t know about you but I can’t go through another labor and delivery”.
And the baby book? What’s a baby book?
August 8th, 2008 at 7:51 am
Wow, I’m only on four but I think you totally summed up the experience of having numerous children perfect! I love the pic of your kids. You have to be so proud.
August 8th, 2008 at 8:11 am
What a beautiful family you have!!!
August 8th, 2008 at 9:13 am
I don’t think it’s the sheer number of kids that are so much the problem, it’s how you space them apart. Looking from the picture they would appear to be about 3 years apart in age difference. 3 years seems to be a good separation in age. The age difference between my oldest 2 is 17 months and then 2 1/2 years between my youngest and middle son. Since my oldest 2 are so close in age it’s like having a sleepover every day.
August 8th, 2008 at 9:50 am
I loved this!! A man perfectly describing the birth order or number of kids and the affects!
We stopped at six because we ran out of seat belts! We had number 5 at home and I wished I’d would have done all of them at home!
Number 6 ended up being all of “their” baby! It was great I had to fight for baby time!
August 8th, 2008 at 10:57 am
That’s a great pic! I have 5 kids and I’d love to have one more…
August 8th, 2008 at 11:45 am
How funny! You said it so well!
Love the picture…looks like they have great senses of humor also!
August 8th, 2008 at 11:47 am
What a GREAT post. And what a cool dad you are! I think my husband might know how many kids we have… or not…
August 8th, 2008 at 2:26 pm
We never dared go where others have boldly gone before… We settled with two kids. However, there was a time when my husband and I pondered a 3rd and he came up with the following analogy: “Life is like a game of tennis and children are the balls. When there is only one ball (child) the parents can lob it easily back and forth. Add a second ball and the game becomes much more challenging, trying to time the balls (children) over the net so as to maintain synchronization, so your partner or yourself don’t lose the ball (child). Add a third ball and it’s mayhem with balls flying in every direction. Holy cow! I can’t even imagine the game with 6 balls. I should also tell you I pretty much suck at tennis! Motherhood on the other hand I think I’m fairly good at. I’m no Venus or Serena mind you, but I manage to hold my own.
August 8th, 2008 at 7:13 pm
That’s a really great post. Neat photo too. The kids all look like they are having fun being together.
August 8th, 2008 at 11:00 pm
Absolutely interesting. I had 5 brothers myself and I know by experience how parents do consider each child a unique one, regardless of whether they were second, third or just last. I do hope that even though there might be physical distance among you all now, you do remember, always, the sweet moments together and the real meaning of being a family. We do… My brothers are always there for me and so I am for them!
August 9th, 2008 at 7:29 am
Great post. It is obvious there is a close bond among the kids. Also, the pic looks like it could be a flyer for a musical or play of some sort
August 9th, 2008 at 2:59 pm
I forgot about that picture, its gotta my favorite too!
August 9th, 2008 at 6:57 pm
I came from a big ol’ family and seeing your kiddos made me miss all my bros and sisters. I love seeing big families…your family looks wonderful!!
August 9th, 2008 at 11:09 pm
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August 10th, 2008 at 10:03 am
What a beautiful family! You should be very proud of them.
August 10th, 2008 at 12:44 pm
That is one beautiful family and clearly a very happy one. Very nice!
August 10th, 2008 at 6:00 pm
That is an awesome picture of my cousins. We haven’t taken one … in a very long time. I can’t remember. We have the family one out in the snow but even that one is outdated now.
August 11th, 2008 at 8:35 am
I have to say I think this picture is much more attractive than the picture of all your bikes. Plus I always liked my hair in that photo too:)
August 13th, 2008 at 9:27 pm
that is such a fun picture. i used to think i wanted lots of children. then i had one.
